I will say that I've protested this horrible habit MUCH, MUCH more than her daddy. Oh! Her 'daddy'. The good guy. The guy that counts to three in 45 seconds and is famous for his 'This is the last time, I mean it' warnings that come 12 times before mommy steps in and means it. Apparently, the cord needs to be cut from her father when it comes to bedtime.
Last night I had the kid in her room...in her room...and in her bed. Sure sounds easy. Have you ever successfully convinced a puppy to sit still when it is surrounded by chew toys, treats and the possibility of a squirrel just in the other room? That is what putting a three year old to bed is like. The adult people, hell even the dog, are all tired - she is still ready to run through all of her toys and books, NEEEEEEEEDS a drink of water and needs to know what's going on in the other room even if it is just her dad sitting on the couch exactly how we left him 5 minutes ago.
So she is in the bed. I go lay down in our bedroom. Charley does her normal stall visits: I just have to tell daddy something, What is this (carrying a random part of a toy), I need some water...it could go on all night. She is eventually in her room. I hear movement, but confining her to one area is a master feat so I'm not complaining. However, her father is complaing.
Dear old dad can't stand it. Sheepishly admits he wants to Charley to sleep in our bed and gives me the 'She's only this little once' speech. He calls for her and asks her to come lie in bed with us despite my warnings:
When does it stop, Gary?
When she's four? Five? I don't know.
Okay, well...fine...when she and her 25 year old boyfriend are lying in bed with you because you let her do whatever she wants just because she says 'daddy' - you let me know how that works. (Extreme, I know, but this is how it all starts. Lohen's parents probably let her sleep in the bed with them, too).
How old is she then?
Seriously? Does that even matter? Twelve? Thirteen? Not my point.
And at that Charley is crawling in the bed with two pillows, a bear and a baby doll, "Here's my things" she announces as she dumps the load at her daddy's feet.
I roll over and let the bosom buddies tuck in the babies and cuddle with pillows. Okay - so I smile a little when she sighs and says, "We are the bestest family." Damn that sociopath.
Do you want to know just how good that little crazy is? It's 4 AM. I get up and realize that it is just me and the kid in the bed.
Yeah, that's right. Dear old dad got kicked out at some point and Mr. Cuddlebear himself is asleep on the couch, while the little princess is asleep in the bed.
Oh yes. This definitely is a moment where I wake up Gary and ask him if he is comfortable. Of course he claims it was 'too hot' in the bedroom - Oh, darling that wasn't the heat that was smothering you - it's the tight, chubby arms of manipulation strangling you.
Sweet dreams.
